These are some of the people, all men, I have lost over the years, nearly all to AIDS. With the exceptions of those additions noted, I stopped actively maintaining this list in 1994. In alphabetical order.

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• William “Wolf” Agress, a lover, died in 1990
• Andre, a bartender at the Tunnel Bar in the East Village, now defunct
• Vincent Barnes
• Jerry Bihm
• Bobby
• Colin Curran
• Erez Dror, co-owner and -founder of the Black Hound Bakery in the East Village, New York City, now defunct (AIDS Quilt Block #3452)
• Jeffrey “Jeff” Glidden, 1958-1987, a lover (AIDS Quilt Blocks #0912 and #5320)
• Paul “Griff” Griffin
• Martin Noel Jorda
• David Kirschenbaum, 1962-1993, community organizer with the New York City Gay & Lesbian Anti-Violence Project
• Art “Artie” Kohn, 1947-1991, founder of the BackRoom BBS in New York City, now defunct (AIDS Quilt Block #2324)
• John Larsen, a lover, died 2007 (Added 2021-12-01)
• Jim Lewis
• Luis
• John Mangano, 1955-1991 (AIDS Quilt Block #3613)
• Jeffrey Martin
• Morris Matthews
• David Mayer (Added 2021-12-01)
• Karl Michalak, 1958-1997
• Mark Melvin, 1962-08-27 – 1992-06-03 (AIDS Quilt Block #2828)
• Norm
• Tony Panico, my first lover in New York City, and the first person close to me to die from AIDS. His name appears twice on the AIDS Memorial Quilt, the first on Panel 05A when it was displayed in 1988. (AIDS Quilt Blocks #0046 and #0652)
• Charles Pope, barfly extraordinaire
• Gordon Provencher, 1955-1992 (AIDS Quilt Block #2291)
• Tom Raleigh
• Craig Rodwell, 1940-1993, founder of the Oscar Wilde Bookstore in Greenwich Village, NYC
• Tony Rostron
• Jurgen Schmitt
• Giulio Sorrentino
• Buddy Volani
• Jeremy Wells
• David Joseph Wilcox, 1957-1996

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Most of these men – including three of my ex-lovers – died before I was 35 years old. (A fourth died in 2007.) There are countless scores, hundreds, more whose names I did not know, whose fates I never learned, or who died since I stopped maintaining this list in 1994.

Related Content

Grief and Gardening: Ashes (Remembrance Day for Lost Species), 2019-12-02 One Score Years Ago, 2016-01-21
An earlier edition of this list: Names, World AIDS Day, 2009-12-01
David Joseph Wilcox, 1957-1996, 2008-01-22
In the Shadow (How shall my heart be reconciled to its feast of losses?), 2007-08-28
Back in the Day, about the Backroom BBS, my first online community, in the 1980s.
Grief & Gardening #1: 1, 5 and 25, 2006-09-04

Links

NY Times Obituary for David Kirschenbaum (PAYWALLED)
Wikipedia: Craig Rodwell
Reagan’s AIDS Legacy / Silence equals death, Allen White, SFGate, 2004-06-08, following Ronald Reagan’s death

World AIDS Day